"PUMP ACTION" Grown Men February 26, 1999

by
Gordon Hom

All throughout this episode, even in the world of make-believe television, the question kept popping up - these are grown men? The storyline is wacky enough - body builders gone amok on hyped-up steroids. It's befitting of a story concocted by Hunter S. Thompson, gonzo journalist and neighbor to Don Johnson at his Woody Creek Ranch in Colorado. "Pump Action" clearly goes after the young male fans of wrestling with wrestler Stone Cold Steve Austin in the line-up. But wrestling is one thing, a cop show is another, as Nash keeps his distance from Jake Cage. It's noted that Cage is not SIU material, and Nash pointedly says to Cage "I just used my ass instead of my head and it got me thinking like you." But still, the overall IQ level drops considerably in this episode as a climactic sock-em-up in a gym unfolds. And appropriately, Nash's goon - Officer Ronnie, shows up in the fracas to lend some muscle. Caitlin even gets into the act by socking Cage in the eye.

And then there's Spike, the oiled, big-breasted female body builder that Joe must capture like a greased pig. She's wearing a thong bikini bottom, and as her just-about-naked shapely butt (on any other show, Spike's butt would have been blurred out) waves inches from Joe's face, Nash gets an idea to roll her up in a rug. Is this the same Cheech Marin that recently lectured at the SF Museum of Modern Art? What do you think was going on in Cheech Marin's mind during the shooting? Hmmm, how am I going to acquire the next Valdez painting? Or I am a grown and mature man and this is what I get paid to do? Do I want to be taken seriously? Cheech lecturing at the MOMA is like Clinton preaching family values - something doesn't add up. (There is an actual wrestler that is a serious art collector and dealer, but could there be a more stunning juxtaposition and clash of aesthetics?)

But Cheech does his job well in an over-the-top February sweeps episode, where all the wild sexy scripts are pulled out. NASH BRIDGES is not above using proven ratings magnets like strippers, wrestlers, and mindless action sequences to pump up those ratings. It all makes for a stupidly hilarious and fun episode, but just don't make it a habit. Otherwise we'll switch to watching wrestling on cable to scout out potential candidates (like Jesse Ventura) for governors of states.

For more, see synopsis for Episode 70

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